Before We Get into People Pleaser, There are a Few Things We Need to Keep in Mind

Magviewinfo - People Pleaser - Be Careful

Many people who battle to please everyone around them experience overwhelming feelings of anger, resentment, and disappointment, as well as depression and burnout at the end of the day, and this is a very true fact. These individuals have a hard time expressing how they feel or what they desire. They are powerless to refuse or defend themselves. Persons who engage in pleasant behavior may be considered their own worst enemy.

Many people, on the other hand, feel that pleasing behavior people are their own worst enemies, which is incorrect. Pleasing behavior people are nice and always want to make others happy; they do not want to hurt others, and God may be pleased with them, thus they are the happiest people on the planet.

But, attempting to gain other’s approval frequently involves ignoring your wants and feelings. In some ways, you're putting on an act. You're doing what you think people want to gain popularity. You may only pretend to love assisting others because it is a necessary element of keeping others happy. This isn't honest, and people-pleasing can harm you and your relationships over time.

I want to demonstrate a few conditions that are unfavorable to pleasing behavior.

Your companion may notice how you agree with everyone or be confused as to why you apologies for something you didn't do. It's easy to get into the habit of investing your time and energy into helping others at the expense of your relationships. When you lie or provide a distorted version of the truth to spare your loved ones' feelings, they may become upset.

One common misunderstanding found among people who continue to please others is that they associate people-pleasing practices with kindness. Most of us were up in families where we were taught to be kind to others and to assist people in their time of need. As a result, when a scenario arises, these people find it incredibly difficult to say no or stand up for them because they are under the impression that they are selfish or bad people. To serve others, you'll require a lot of energy and emotional resources. You won't be able to do anything for anyone else if you don't take care of yourself. It's not selfish to prioritize your own needs; it's healthy.

You must learn to put yourself first in your priorities. Getting approval from others will never be sufficient. As a result, you must learn to recognize your own needs in all situations. It's fine for you to set limits with others when the situation calls for it. You have no control over other people's thoughts, emotions, or behaviors. It's fine if you give yourself the freedom to do anything you want without feeling guilty.

Let's discuss the inner thoughts of those who have pleasing behaviors. It's hardly surprising that such thoughts can enter into our heads at any time.

We find it difficult to say no, we find ourselves being considerate of everyone's feelings, we find ourselves apologizing frequently, we resent ourselves a little because we can't say no, we feel uncomfortable knowing that someone is angry or upset with us, we need others to like us to feel good, we find it difficult to make decisions for ourselves, and we constantly end up taking everyone's opinions.

So the main question is how we can get out of these situations.

Rather than only listening to what the other person says, we must observe their actions. The majority of people are familiar with the concept of relationships. They know how to say all the right things, but we need to see what they do to get a true sense of who they are.

We must begin to recognize our limitations and set restrictions on how we spend our time. We should aim to focus our energy on things that are in line with our principles and make us happy. When someone asks us for something, we need to keep track of how often we say yes. We must consider how we are feeling at the time.

We must be truthful with ourselves and recognize our talents and flaws. We must work on ourselves to become psychologically, emotionally, socially, spiritually, intellectually, and physically fit and balanced. This is a lifelong project, but it all starts with self-awareness.

We don't need to defend ourselves if our activities were not intended to cause harm. Don't try to rationalize decisions or choices. However, we should not excuse our acts if our behavior was not wrong and another person is upset with us. We must desire to be able to respond with a nice expression on our face and a neutral tone of voice.

We need to realize that if we enable individuals to act badly, they will continue to act badly. Three things are likely to occur if we do not accept bad behavior. The person will either learn to stop behaving in that manner, will behave in that manner with other people but not with us, will behave badly in a new manner, or will choose not to interact with us. Hopefully, the individual learns to change his or her undesirable habits. But be cautious of anyone who continues to treat others badly or who acts out against us in some other way. These are warning signs that they are not emotionally healthy.

Finally, I'd like to emphasize the importance of always being kind to others, but first and foremost, take care of yourself. Second, as you grow more assertive, your needs will be better satisfied, and your relationships will become more rewarding to you.

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